I think my vagina is haunted
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
