1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
