Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
