So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
