Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
