Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
