im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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