chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Girls should come with a carfax report
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
