you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize