This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
