So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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