i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize