if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
