I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
