so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize