wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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