he shaved USA in his pubs
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
