"it" just moved
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
