just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
