Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
