Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize