yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
The air taste purple.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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