I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
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