I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Shame - the story of my life.
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