all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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