I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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