I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Randomize
