Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
