unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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