I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
