If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
