i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
