If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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