Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
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