it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
