There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I need moral support for this bender
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
