You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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