He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
vagina is talking i cant
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
