I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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