Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
