I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
