I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
jump out the window naked night went bad
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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