her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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