People in love make me want to vomit
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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