i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
