Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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