Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
