TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Semen is not good for contacts.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
