I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
