Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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